The 11th Reason Why Twilight Annoys the Hell Out of Me

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11. Edward tries to pimp Bella out (ref: Breaking Dawn)
  

See '10 Reasons Why Twilight Annoys the Hell Out of Me' here

The Hunger Games (No Spoilers)

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If you're sick to the back teeth of Edward Cullen and you've read the Harry Potter books fifty times over (each) only to realise that they will never ever have anything new to offer, you'll LOVE the Hunger Games trilogy. I've just finished the last book in the series and I felt compelled to post this up as soon as possible. This isn't a review, more of a 'you NEED to read these books!' post.

The first book is set in post apocalyptic times, in a country called Panem and is told from the point of view of Katniss Everdeen. She is young, cold and calculating but also compassionate and very likable - a proper heroine, AT long LAST! (cough, Bella Swan). She lives in a time of hardship and want; her people are oppressed by the government based in Capitol and are worked like slaves.

There are 13 Districts in the country and each are forced to contribute to the upkeep of the Capitol in terms of food, fuel and servants. As a result, the people of the Capitol live in luxury and ignorance while people of the Districts live and die like cattle.

The Districts also provide the Capitol with entertainment in the form of the annual Hunger Games. Two children are picked by lottery from each District and are put in an arena until one survives and is crowned the victor. Participation is mandatory and no child is exempt. The best way I can describe the Games is like a Big Brother seires set in a booby-trapped environment where all the contestants are young children who must fight to the death. The Producers have no morals and the audience celebrate every death, with no remorse or reflection on the loss of lives. Districts are forced to gather to watch their children get slaughtered while they cheer on. Protests, dissent and calls for change doesn't get your friends and family killed - it gets your entire District annihilated.

Seriously, seriously give these a read. Its really ones of those books that will keep you hooked until the very last word. Every page has a surprise and every chapter reveals a twist that no-one, NO ONE, can predict. Stephen King said of the book 'Constant suspense... I couldn't stop reading.' The social commentary in these books are staggering and thought provoking. Its touches on greed, consumption, entertainment, celebrity and power.

If you're not convinced you can read Chapters 1 and 2 for free here.

If you want to buy the book you can do so here (Amazon).

10 Reasons Why Twilight Annoys the Hell Out of Me

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I used to be a crazy obsessed Twilight fan. Fair enough, not as mad as those who tattoo themselves with Pattinson's face, sleep between Twilight bed sheets and actually believe that sparkly vampires exist. And they're just the mums.

So why have I gone from Cullen obsessed fan girl to someone who'd rather lose both her legs than read one of those books again?

1. I. GREW. UP.

2. Edward Cullen is so annoyingly boring and obsessive. Initially, I thought he was unbelievably romantic, thoughtful and devoted... Now I think if I was Bella, I'd sit Edward down and introduce him to something called "boundaries"! No climbing in through my window at night to watch me sleep, no breaking MY car, no telling me who I can and can't see, no force feeding and no asking me stupid questions!

3. Bella is so irritating. Why does she put up with all the above? She's not likable in the least, a bit of a perv and seems to have no ambition other than to give up her soul just so she can feel as pretty as her glittery vampire boyfriend.

4. Edward left Bella in New Moon. She's left heartbroken, hurting and a bit mentally unwell but she goes to save Edward's non-life towards the end of the book. I'm fine with that. What I'm NOT ok with is when she TAKES HIM BACK no questions asked. Dude, he left you? I don't care if it drove him to near suicide HE LEFT YOU then had the CHEEK to get all jealous when you decide you actually kinda like Jacob.

5. Bella needs to grow a pair. See above. What would have been great is if Bella got with Jacob as Edward watched on, pining from the side lines.

6. Bella is self obsessed and patronising. She thinks everyone at school is beneath her and OH she is prepared to give up her PARENTS for a walking talking corpse she has barely known for a few months.

7. Is Edward hungry for ALL her blood? Like, is he banned from her house at certain times of the month? Gross. I bet it makes his mouth water. He's a vampire, so I don't think he cares which orifice it comes out of. EW.

8. The fight that never was in Breaking Dawn. That was the biggest, most disappointing anti-climax I have ever had the misfortune to read.

9. It’s not the best piece of literature I have read. Sorry, but there really should have been someone to proof read the thing at least.

10. Some people claim that author Stephenie Meyer based the character Bella on herself. I don't know if this is true or not but it’s in my head and I can't help it. It’s quite disconcerting to think that she thanks her husband and kids in the book, and then hurries off to her room to write more about a sexually frustrated vampire who falls in love with a character who looks remarkably like herself...

Riiight...